Conflict Resolution

Conflict is the condition that debilitates communication – the best way to overcome conflict is to understand the situation and understand your position in context (self awareness).

The conflict resolution model helps you identify the type of conflict and possible outcomes to better understand the situation and your role n the conflict resolution. There are essentially six different ways of dealing with conflict:

• Avoid: escape the conflict, don’t deal with it, and let it fester. The outcome is a lose-lose situation.
• Fight: beat the other side at all costs. Command and conquer. The outcome is a win-lose situation.
• Give up: Let the other side have their own way. Losing is for losers – the outcome is a lose-win situation
• Evade: delegate the decision to a third party and evade confrontation. The outcome is a lose-lose situation
• Compromise: both parties give up a little to win a little – not an ideal solution for either party. The outcome is a win-lose/win-lose situation.
• Consensus: find a new solution developed by both parties. The outcome is a win-win situation.

What’s most important is to understand that the first three are emotional reactions – lead by little or no reasoning. The latter three are rational reactions caused by a preceding thought process leading up to an outcome.

Lets put this into context – your husband wants to watch Batman go head to head with the Joker, but you’d rather watch Mr. Big put the moves on Carrie. You both sit on the couch, both reach for the remote, and both try to call on your Jedi mind powers to kill the other person – conflict Here are the situations in context:

• Avoid: leave the room, go to bed, and pray for lightning to strike the television set.
• Fight: you take a spatula and beat your husband to death while he tries to stay in control of the remote control. Promise he will sleep on the couch that night. Pull out all the stops until he gives in.
• Give up: What the heck, it’s not worth it, you’ll give up on a good show – life’s not worth the strife.
• Evade: Tell your mother – spouses hate dealing with the in-laws.
• Compromise: Watch half of Batman and half of Sex in the City.
• Consensus: Get on Netflix.com, but both, and spend a cosy night together watching both movies right after the other – order Chinese and be merry.

“Our failures are due not to the defeats we suffer, but to the conflicts we don’t participate in”

This model is from The Decision Book. Please make sure to visit 50 Top Models – the author’s website. If you like what you see, buy the book! Support the author and awesome content.